The Twitter Preservation Society

After a while, even Wheel of Fortune had to do it in order to preserve the integrity of the game.

When it came to the final puzzle, everyone kept picking the same letters over and over again – r, s, t, l, n and e. It was easy. Always managed to reveal some part of the puzzle. But after a while, boy does that get boring for everyone. So the makers of The Wheel modified the game and automatically gave those letters, and had them choose a few additional letters of their own choice. In essence, they retired those commons letters and didn’t let contestants (over)play them. To make The Wheel a little less predictable and keep people viewers interested.

I propose Twitter doing the same thing.

There are certain “go-to” tweets that just have to go. I’m looking at you, “I can’t believe the weekend is already over” tweets. And any variation of “Ugh! It’s Monday already?” tweets between the hours of 6-9am. Guess what? Nobody likes Mondays. Everyone’s weekend goes by too quickly – it’s because there are only two days to it, compared to five days of the work week. Mathematically, of course the weekend flies by in a fraction of the time your work week does. It’s only a fraction as long!

Twitter needs to pull a Wheel of Fortune and no longer allow the user to play those tweets. Maybe the Fail Whale comes out of the water when it sees one of those tweets, and gobbles it up. So there’s no evidence of it, and protects the rest of us from the drivel. Sure, the argument is that we can always unfollow. Just like, we can turn the channel if we had been bored by the final puzzle. But we like the rest of the game. And I like all of the other tweets. So I’m not unfollowing over it, nor am I turning the channel. As long as it remains the exception, and not the norm.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have stuff to do. The weekend is only two days long, y’know!


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